Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Something I Don't Understand

Think of a movie that you have never seen. It doesn't have to be a classic, but it should be one that others have seen. It could even be a movie so bad (Gigli) that you're not even sure that you'll ever find someone who has seen it.

Now, bring it up in the next conversation you have with a friend, but make sure to tell them that you've never seen it.

One of two things will happen.

1. They will say, "Oh, that's a great movie. You have to rent it."


2. They will freak the fuck out and say, "YOU'VE NEVER SEEN E.T.? OH MY GOD? WHAT ARE YOU, SOME KIND OF MONSTER? WHO HASN'T SEEN E.T.?

Me. I haven't seen E.T., and to be honest, I don't even know if I should have put periods after the E and the T, and I'm too lazy to Google it right now. Besides, that's not the point.

The point is that people are out of their minds when it comes to their enthusiasm over their favorite movies. Calm the fuck down already. So what if I didn't see that movie? Why are you having the same reaction you would if I told you that I just kidnapped a baby and fed it to my cats?

And you know what? I have seen a lot of movies that others haven't, but I don't grab them by the hair, drag them to the video store and demand that they rent it immediately or I'll blow their heads off.

Other movies I have never seen include, but are not limited to:
Indiana Jones
Star Wars
Harry Potter
The King's Speech
Oceans Eleven/Twelve/Thirteen
Full Metal Jacket
Apocalypse Now
Conan the Barbarian
Top Gun
Dumb and Dumber...

The list is endless. Feel free to overreact from the privacy of your own home, but when you're done with that, why not leave a comment below and recommend something for me to watch tonight.


Hamamama said...

What?! you havent seen ET? E.T.?
you would actually enjoy it - it's very endearing....I think you would like King's Speech too. I havent seen Goonies and have gotten the "what-you-havent-seen-Goonies" line too.

Anonymous said...

You guys haven't seen Goonies!??!?! I feel sorry for your childhoods (or lack thereof).