And then this happens:
As you can see, we have two stupid, clueless tourists who apparently think the doors were designed so that two people could jam in simultaneously and tip toe their way through, crotch to butt. Sometimes their fatness and/or luggage will jam the door, fucking everyone up on both sides.
In a perfect world, an overhead sensor would detect when two people try to enter at once. The doors would automatically lock, trapping them, while the floor gives way, dumping them into the sewer.
Mayor Bloomberg has refused to meet with me regarding my Dump The Dumbshits Plan, so instead, I have devised this simple diagram for tourists. (click to enlarge) Feel free to print this out and distribute at will.