Monday, November 10, 2008

The Great 2008 Sofa Bed Hunt, Part 1

How hard is it to shop for a sofa bed in 2008?

Click Read More to find out.

We had three simple requirements.

1. Fabric, as leather is cliche and not cat proof.
2. A neutral color to go with the blue/teal chairs we already own
3. Something compact, but with a full sized mattress. Under 80 inches.

My BFF The Internet told me that such a sofabed exists, so I was confident that we would find one relatively easily.

Our first stop was Jennifer Convertibles on Northern Boulevard in Queens.

Want a pretty color or a nice pattern? Then be prepared to wait at least 6 weeks. If you're boring and need something immediately, Jennifer Convertibles has a warehouse full of beige, taupe, cream, white, and off-white sofa beds available for immediate delivery!

The only exception was a hideous, yet compact CORDOUROY couch in a shade of brown that might be called "1973."

Below is the couch we saw. Note that they've used a LOT of accessories to make this cheap, $400 couch look good, and that they've featured the white model, which looks A) bigger and B) less hienous.

I'll bet that off-center coffee table is hiding a collapsing frame or unravelling fabric.

For a moment, we considered a black leather sofabed, but when I sat on it, I noticed no leather smell. The tag said something ambiguous, like, "LeatherStyle" or something like that. Translation: Pleather.

We went next door to Pier 1, where they had but one sofabed on display. Larry quickly flagged down a disaffected, moody asshole friendly sales associate.

"Is this the only sofa bed you have?" asked Larry.

After some indecipherable mumbling, the associate walked away, giving us the impression that he was going to find out.

You'd think so, right?


"Are you going to find out, or are you just walking away from me?" yelled Larry.

As it turned out, he was just walking away.

"No wonder they're going out of business," Larry fumed as we walked out the door.

I think Pier 1's tagline should be: "Good for knick-knacks...and that's about it."

To Be Continued

And by the way, that HIDEOUS sofa bed at the top is available for viewing/mocking here.


joe*to*hell said...

shoudl have hired a professional....... just saying

Chris said...

We is po. We can't afford no proffeshunal.

joe*to*hell said...

i work real cheap. and i sent you to room and board