Monday, July 21, 2008
Maybe a Billboard Would Help
Last week, you may remember that I tried to get back on the South Beach diet wagon.
Not only did I fall off the wagon, but the horses got away, and then the wagon crashed and burst into a fireball. This all happened quicker than you can say "Entenmann's chocolate cake."
So, last night I tried again. I boiled up a bunch of eggs, put two in a container, and stuck a Post-ItTM note on the front door to remind me to take the eggs with me for breakfast.
And I forgot the fucking eggs. Of course, I was too far from home by the time I remembered, too.
I used to complain about my mother nagging me when I was a kid. "Do your homework!" "Don't forget your lunch!" "Stop playing with matches!"
Maybe she needs to move in with me. Clearly, I can't make it on my own.