Dear Muffin Bandit (a.k.a. Dirty Finger Food Picker, Jerk, Selfish Moron, Crackpot, Idiot)
Since my subtle note did nothing last time, I've had to resort to this.
STOP PICKING THE LEFTOVER MUFFINS AND LEAVING THE GOD DAMN CARCASS FOR OTHERS TO MOURN!
Have you considered that maybe someone else would have liked that corn muffin? Do you realize you're not at home? Ever hear of germs? Bad manners, bad!
Next time, take the entire mini muffin away with you, eat your selected portion, then throw the rest away. Walking into the kitchen while craving a muffin, only to find something that's been handled like this is wrong on many levels.
I think I speak for all of us at the office when I say that we'd rather see no muffin at all, instead of one that's been torn apart.
Stop it, already.
P.S. - the same thing goes for pizza, sandwiches, cookies, salad (though hard to spot), and any other food item. If it goes in your mouth, the rule applies. Thank you in advance for your cooperation.