Monday, October 29, 2007


I saw Helen this weekend. She picked me up in her car and we went for our weekend coffee clatch. She apologized for being late, annoyed that she managed to hit traffic.

As we lumbered down Ditmars boulevard, we yelled at other cars for moving slowly. It got the best of me when I yelled out a particularly nasty four letter word--with the window open.

Then I told Helen, "You know what I would love? If I could have a big car with metal bumpers all around. And that I could ram cars out of the way, like a demolition derby. And get away with it."

And she agreed with me. We've officially bonded. Marriage is the next logical step.

Automakers, listen up. The SUV craze has to end some time, so what the @#%& are you waiting for?!

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