Friday, February 2, 2007

How Many, Jackass On Four?

These are my frustrations at 11:40 p.m.

How many times do I have to bang on the ceiling, Jackass On Four? How many times do you have to make noise, stomp around, drop things, roll things, and play your fucking negative-IQ rap music before I have to take out The Club and bang it on the ceiling like a fucking cave man to make you stop? (It worked tonight, which proves my theory that you are doing it on purpose, you sick and depraved miscreant) How many times do I need to be jolted out of bed at 4:30, because that is when you come stumbling in, high on drugs and alcohol?

How many people do you need to have over on a typical evening for your little drug party?

How many times do we have to complain to the coop board, which seems to do nothing? How many times do I have to pray for you to be taken out by a city bus? How many more days until you are fired from your cushy high paying job and forced into another neighborhood, far away from us?

How old are you, really? How did you manage to get past the coop board? How? How come you're not in jail?

I don't want to say I hate you, but I do. I hate you with a passion that burns brighter than the sun. I can't wait until I get a nice cold, so I can come up to your floor and cough all over your fucking doorknob. It may not be right, but you don't play fair, so you are asking for it, asshole. And if that's what it takes to immobilize you for a few days so that I can get some sleep without the need for earplugs, so be it. You are the most fucked up human being on this planet, if you are human at all. Doing construction on the day before Christmas? Please tell me that you are getting ready to sell your apartment. And yes, I ratted you out to that member of the coop board in the elevator because you were making noise well past the 5pm limit. I told him what an asshole you are. He agrees.

I loathe your scrawny existence, inconsiderate 140 lb asshole. When the bomb drops there will be just roaches and you left to roam the planet, I'm sure of it.

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